Fleas, Lids, and Your Future
Training Fleas
Fleas have the most remarkable ability to leap - up to 200 times their length. That’s like a human jumping to the top of the Empire State Building! That’s how they get from animal to animal to survive and procreate.
A simple method tames this ability. If you put fleas into a jar and put a lid on it for a while, when you remove the lid the fleas will not leap out of it. They will just jump up and down in the jar as if the lid were still there. Even though their inherent ability would allow them to leap far beyond the jar’s confines, they continue to act as though they’re bound by the lid’s limits.
What happened to the fleas? Why do they no longer leave the jar? They believe that the past dictates the future. Since a lid was there before, they’re conditioned to believe a lid is still there. So, they get stuck in the jar, not by the reality of the circumstance but by the beliefs their mind has formed from their past experiences.
What’s more: not only will these fleas be stuck in the jar, when they procreate their descendants won’t leave the jar either! The now-make-believe limitation becomes real for subsequent generations, too!
Training Humans
Like fleas in a jar, we are born into a world where lid-like things happen. We try something, and it doesn’t go the way we hoped. We feel sadness, hurt, embarrassment, or loss. We begin to form a belief that what happened in the past is what will happen in the future. And we don’t want to feel the pain or discomfort of failure that we experienced in the past! So, we proceed to bounce in smaller and smaller jars, oblivious to our own extraordinary “leaping capacity” and the range of possibilities we could leap towards in our lives and in the world around us.
As with the descendants of the jar’s original fleas, our made-up limitations seem more and more real based on the families, friends, communities, and cultures we are raised in. We come to believe there are things we can’t achieve and other things we shouldn’t. And the more real those limitations seem, the less we’ll pursue, the less we’ll dream of, the less we’ll even realize is possible!
Though many lids are imaginary, the consequences of believing in them are real! Let’s say you want to have a happy, loving relationship. But you don’t pursue one because your heart broke in the past. Or you settle for unfulfilling relationships because past experiences have you believing there’s nothing better out there. You might notice similar patterns of limitation in your career, creative pursuits, family or friendships, community or political service, personal growth or self-care: in every arena you could possibly impact.
Creating from the Past? …Or the Future!
This is what’s like to be human, for most of us. We are kept from futures we’d love because we let beliefs from the past dictate what we choose in the present. We believe how it went is how it will go. We go on creating the future from the past, unaware of and missing out on an infinite abundance of extraordinary possibilities outside of the jar.
It’s good to notice these patterns without self-recrimination. This is a natural process that has a lot of evolutionary and survival value! There are certainly times to let what you learned in the past impact your current choices. There’s nothing wrong with us or fleas for living this way. But some imaginary lids are keeping us from wonderful outcomes for ourselves and the world.
How do we overcome the “lids” that hold us back? Many approaches may help. Here’s one: create from the future instead!
Here’s how it works. Take yourself out of your present circumstances, out of all the past your mind carries around. Let yourself dream of what could be as if there were no barriers, as if no past had happened, as if you appeared on earth today and can be placed into any life and world you desire. Dream without knowing how to get there or what to do. Just dream into the most vibrant, satisfying, desired future you can and let yourself be there, in that future. Then, ask: How did I get here? How was this created? Standing in that future possibility, look back to now and discover paths you might otherwise have never imagined.
Get Supported!
Working with a great coach can help you:
Clarify what matters most to you — what your highest values and priorities are,
Envision a bold, abundant future, beyond the constraints of lids from your past,
Create a roadmap towards that future with milestones and specific action steps,
Identify and overcome the blocks that get in the way of that future, and
Become more empowered, joyful, loving, and authentic throughout the journey!
Curious about the process? Let’s connect, talk about the future you desire, and whether coaching is a good fit!